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Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples, 20th Anniversary Edition |  | Author: Ph.D. Harville Hendrix Ph.D.
Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin
Category: Book
List Price: $15.00
Buy Used: $5.46
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Seller: Best-Seller-Books
Rating:  150 reviews
Sales Rank: 850
Media: Paperback
Edition: Revised and Updated
Pages: 320
Number Of Items: 1
Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.7
Dimensions (in): 7.9 x 5.2 x 1.5
ISBN: 0805087001
Dewey Decimal Number: 306.7
EAN: 9780805087000
ASIN: 0805087001
Publication Date: December 26, 2007
Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days
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| Features:
| • | ISBN13: 9780805087000 | | • | Condition: NEW | | • | Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark. |
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| Editorial Reviews:
Amazon.com Review
When Harville Hendrix writes about relationships, he discusses them not just as an educator and a therapist, but as a man who has himself been through a failed marriage. Hendrix felt the sting of his divorce intensely because he believed it signaled not only his failure as a husband but also his failure as a couples counselor. Investigating why his marriage dissolved led him to start looking into the psychology of love. Marriage, he ultimately discovered, is the "practice of becoming passionate friends." As a result of his research, Hendrix created a therapy he calls Imago Relationship Therapy. In it, he combines what he's learned in a number of disciplines, including the behavioral sciences, depth psychology, cognitive therapy, and Gestalt therapy, to name just a few. He expounds upon this approach in Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples. His purpose in writing the book, he says, is "to share with you what I have learned about the psychology of love relationships, and to help you transform your relationship into a lasting source of love and companionship." Divided into three sections, the book covers "The Unconscious Marriage," which details a marriage in which the remaining desires and behavior of childhood interfere with the current relationship; "The Conscious Marriage," which shows a marriage that fulfils those childhood needs in a positive manner; and a 10-week "course in relationship therapy, " which gives detailed exercises for you and your partner to follow in order to learn how to "replace confrontation and criticism ... with a healing process of mutual growth and support." The text is occasionally dry and technical; however, the information provided is valuable, the case studies are interesting, and the exercises are revealing and helpful. By utilizing his program, Hendrix hopes you too will be able to solve your marital difficulties without the expense of a therapist. --Jenny Brown
Product Description
REVISED AND WITH A NEW FOREWORD ARE YOU GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT? Originally published in 1988, Getting the Love You Want has helped millions of couples attain more loving, supportive, and deeply satisfying relationships. The 20th anniversary edition contains extensive revisions to this groundbreaking book, with a new chapter, new exercises, and a foreword detailing Dr. Hendrix’s updated philosophy for eliminating all negativity from couples’ daily interactions, allowing readers of the 2008 edition to benefit from his ongoing discoveries during his last two decades of work. Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., in partnership with his wife, Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD., originated Imago Relationship Therapy, a unique healing process for couples, prospective couples, and parents. Together they have more than thirty years’ experience as educators and therapists and their work has been translated into more than 50 languages, with Imago practiced by two thousand therapists worldwide. Harville and Helen have six children and live in New York and New Mexico.
Book Description
In Getting the Love You Want, Dr. Harville Hendrix presents the relationship skills that have already helped hundreds of thousands of couples to replace confrontation and criticism with a healing process of mutual growth and support. This extraordinary practical guide describes the revolutionary technique of Imago Relationship Therapy, which combines a number of disciplines--including the behavioral sciences, depth psychology, cognitive therapy, and Gestalt therapy, among others--to create a program to resolve conflict and renew communication and passion.
Getting the Love You Want describes the three stages of intimate relationships, provides illustrative case studies and gives helpful recommendations to overcome the obstacles in those stages to create a stronger bond between couples. First, he chronicles the stages of most relationships-attraction, romantic love and the power struggle-and suggests ways for partners to identify the conflicts associated with each of them. Then, he explores methods for achieving a "Conscious Marriage," where the early phases of romance are rekindled and confrontation is slowly replaced by growth and support. Finally, Dr. Hendrix incorporates these ideas into a unique therapeutic course, offering a series of proven exercises that lead to insight, resolution and revitalization. Step by step, he describes how to communicate with greater accuracy and sensitivity, how to let go of self-defeating behaviors, and how to focus energy on meeting each partners' needs.
With Getting the Love You Want couples in any stage of a relationship can resolve their conflicts and achieve mutual emotional satisfaction.
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| Customer Reviews:
Showing reviews 1-5 of 150
 Relationships 101 March 8, 2010
Hunter Phoenix (Los Angeles, CA)
This is a wonderful book, and should be mandatory reading for anyone in a relationship or thinking about one. It provides valuable insights into basic human behavior, as well as practical tools for improving communication, deepening understanding and creating greater intimacy. Reading this book changed all of my relationships dramatically. It improved my familial relationships, romantic relationships, and probably most importantly my relationship with myself. If you want better relationships, this is a must read!
Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples February 10, 2010
Jeff (Tennessee)
My wife has enjoyed the book and I have really enjoyed the audio CD during my drive time.
I would not consider this just another "self-help" book. The information in book really got me thinking about my
relationship with my wife and how our past really does affect our future. The book gave us Hope that we will not be just another divorce couple.
Absolutely First Rate February 4, 2010
John Wareham (New York)
In my leadership coaching practice--and as the author of "SONNETS FOR SINNERS: Everything One Needs to Know About Illicit Love"--I recommend this book more than any other for people having relationship problems. I have never seen a better model for understanding why things go wrong in a marriage. It can be characterized as an instrument that helps any reader understand precisely what problems he or she is likely to provoke in any relationship, and then deal with them.
 This book is "old-fashioned" and directed towards naive/sheltered individuals February 1, 2010
M. Liu (Boston, MA)
4 out of 6 found this review helpful
I am writing this review in January 2010, and my fiance and I are in our late 20s with phds from MIT. We felt that this book was extremely "old-fashioned" in that it spent an enormous amount of time explaining the biological innerworkings of people and told so many stories of fetuses and childhood needs. All of this explanation seemed redundant and condescending, as even young kids living in 2010 have been thoroughly exposed to information (from the internet and tv); even young kids probably understand that yes, there are biological reasons that explain attraction between human beings. The author tended to tell very general stories and oversimplify the explanations. For example, the author mentioned that one of his female clients that often complains that she "can't think", and this is attributed to her mother often telling her that she wasn't smart so she should marry a smart man; is that all the author has to offer as part of his analysis? These days, any person that "can't think" on a regular basis would probably have consulted doctors, psychologists, etc., and it is very difficult to attribute this to one statement that one's mother made. I found the stories, analysis, and explanations very unsatifying. Perhaps people that were naive, or not critical, appreciate this book, and obviously many people have loved this book judging from the overwhelming number of 5-star ratings. But my fiance and I grew very impatient at what little advice this book actually offered to us. We rate this as a 1-star book.
Good Book January 7, 2010
Shelly Chan (Glenview, IL USA)
My spouse and I are reading the book right now based on a recommendation. The book has some interesting theories. Good for couples in crisis.
Showing reviews 1-5 of 150
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